Friday, October 9, 2015

Mathématiques et en sciences ou est-ce la science et les mathématiques ?

I give up!

Most of you know that when I set out to do something that I have a plan et (and) know how to get to where I want to be ... because of this trait I rarely have surprises - donc (so) you wouldn't be surprised to know that during my year getting ready to move to Paris I did a lot of research et (and) because of that my transition here has been quite easy - I feel like I'm at home (other than the language thing) ..... Well, apparently there was one area of research that I didn't do enough looking into - cooking, more specifically recipes ....

I brought with me my kitchen scale that shows ounces et (and) grams, so I figured I was set - I'd just use that little switch adjustment between the two et (and) I'd be set ..... Ha! WRONG ....

Donc (so), a couple of weeks ago I was sick - I had a cold et (and) was feeling puny, I decided I wanted comfort food donc (so) what is better than chocolate chip cookies .... Off to my favorite place I went (et [and] just where is that? ...... did you say "Monoprix"?) to get the ingredients et (and) of course that was a learning experience itself - (did you know that baking soda is not sold in the grocery store mais (means = but) instead is sold in the pharmacy?) .... once home I then had to convert my Nestle Toll House Cookie recipe to the metric measurements - easy, oui? Non (mean = no)!

This is what the converted (I thought) recipe looked like (using the premise that 1 ml = 1 gram):
 
158.51 ml butter, melted
473.18 ml packed brown sugar
2 large eggs (hey - this one was easy)
473.18 ml flour
4.92 ml baking soda
4.92 ml salt
9.85 ml vanilla
236.59 ml chocolate chips
 
et (and), since I didn't have any baking soda - I found that you can substitute baking powder - just use three times as much .....Needless to say, my cookies were an unmitigated disaster!!!!  (Good Lord - just looking at that recipe makes me break out in a sweat)
 
Donc (so), I realized I needed to do some research into how to convert recipes ..... et (and) OMG you have to know both science and math to do so ..... let me explain:
 
The first thing I learned is that millimeters (ml) are NOT the same as grams (g), hence my cookie disaster ..... a millimeter is "volume" (space) whereas a gram is "mass" (amount of matter) .... already my head is exploding - if I read that above description out of this context I'd believe I was reading about space - as in the sky, the moons, the sun, the solar system ....
 
Then I find this nice (ahem) set of directions regarding food conversion - keeping in mind the difference between "volume" (ml) et (and) "mass" (g):
 
water      1 ml = 1 g        (they are equal)
milk        1 ml = 1.03 g   (you have to multiply by 1.03)
butter     1 ml = 0.911 g  (multiply by 0.911)
flour       1 ml = 0.57 g    (multiply by 0.57)  
 
more proof of why my cookies were awful .....
 
Then the icing on the cake (figuratively - ha!) ..... I read the following for a conversion tool: "Use an online calculator ... A millimeter is the same as a cubic centimeter, so select 'cubic centimeter' and enter the volume in millimeters" ..... Nope, sorry, ain't gonna happen!!!!!!
 
You may have guessed by now that "science and math" are not my strong points, along with the fact that I'm way too lazy to sit down et (and) convert all my recipes .... MAIS (BUT) I am a very good problem solver - donc (so) I've since asked a friend to send to me U.S.A. measuring cups et (and) measuring spoons et (and) once I get them I'll be able to cook et (and) bake to my heart's content ...
 
(I'm thinking this metric system thing - even though everywhere else in the world it's used (et) and is considered easier than what the USA uses - may be an even steeper uphill battle for me than learning the French language)
 
Donc (so), as I first said in this post "I give up" - I did for a few days until my problem solving brain kicked in .....
 
Bon appétit!